These past few weeks I have enjoyed our Christian Life Coaching classes. I have enjoyed the reading in Gary R. Collins book. I have enjoyed the interaction with my "buddy" Laurie Pittman. I have also been enlightened by the different tests we have taken... The Christian Life Profile Assessment, our personality test - DISC, and our Spiritual Gifts test.
My initial thoughts about my personal discovery is that I am wired to Coach. I reread the "Marks of a Great Coach" and I am reaffirmed that God has designed me to Coach. The four marks of a great coach are:
1. Effective coach knows themselves.
2. Effective coaches are sensitive people.
3. Effective coaches believe in people.
4. Effective coaches have synergy with the people the coach. They are flexible, firm in their convictions and psychologically astute. Also, good leaders.
I learned a lot from all the tests and here is my findings that I learned from each test:
My first test was the Christian Life Profile test. In that test we were to take it ourselves and then ask at least three people to access our spiritual lives. We are knew to the area and I did not have any old friends to file out the profile. Actually, I ask one long time friend of 20 years and she did not feel comfortable doing it. I understand that it is a hard position to put a person in. My other friends were encouraging and (I think) honest. I do think they were too gracious. They have walked with me through a heartache and I have walked with them through heartache. I especially spend a lot of time with one of them. Every week we meet for coffee and we have met for four years. My other friend lives in the neighborhood and we have biked and spent time as a couples with our husbands. I can see I need to work on areas in difficult circumstances that they should not govern my moods. I am on a road to forgiveness, although, it is a road that I must work through for life. When I combined my scores I found that I am strong in Identity in Christ, Prayer and Single-mindedness, Self-Control and Hope. I know God has met me in the midst of much heartache and that is why I have a strong Identity in Christ plus prayer is my communication with God at any moment and I have learned to throw myself on the ground in my closet to surrender my heartache and painful losses to him. God has given me Hope in the midst of despair. I know that God can bloom a beautiful flower in the midst of the manure (as I call it).
The DISC test was helpful in confirming my personality type. I am an D/I/S and it is clear in can be dominating, inspiring and submissive at the same time. I am not cautious and calculating. This is difficult at times being married to a D/C.
I know that I am an Influencer as I lead groups and Bible Studies. I most definitely am not organized and calculating and careful. Those are areas I need to be coached on! I have learned not to make promises I cannot keep and I am big on keeping commitments. I am thankful my "influencing" personality has learned to be big on commitment and holding true to my commitments. I reflect on that verse... "let your yes be yes and your no be no." I have also learned that anything in life takes work and perseverance. I am learning to block my days in such a way that on Tuesday and Friday I am home studying and writing. It is difficult for me to do that because my "I" side wants to spend time with people. If I am to reach the goals God has given me then I need to hold to this schedule and try not to get distracted.
I am a driver (Dominate) but mainly for my kids. I did not go to college and I wanted my kids to do well in school and finish well so they can be prepared for whatever God has called them to do. I do drive myself when it comes to working out. Everyday I hit the gym, walk and/or go on a bike ride or (before knee surgery) run. I feel better and I have a better quality of life by holding to this physical commitment. I am also Dominate in that I am a "bottom line" person. I do not want the flowery explanation of all the reasons why I should or should not do something. I want to know what to do and then I will do it or I will decided what to do and I will do it.
My "I" side shows me I hate details! I do not like to think through the details and I do not want to start anything for fear I will need to make decisions and think through the details. I do need to work on that characteristic.
I am a S too and I can see the big part of my S personality is I am reserved. I used to not be reserved but because of a heartache I went through five years ago I do not trust people easily. I would rather be a mentor or disciple where I do not have to share too much about myself personally.
I also do not like conflict and I would like peace at all costs. My "D" side needs to take over in this area. Overall, the DISC test was insightful and helpful. I am currently finishing the book "Codependent No More" by Beatty and she is helpful in that I am learning to "detach with love." I can not please everyone and and I do have to make hard decisions regarding my kids but I do not have to carry their disappointment emotionally. I can detach from the hurt but show compassion with their disappointment.
I desire to hone in on my strengths in my personality profile. I will be reading Strength Finder to get working through the areas that are strong and if I have to work on the weak areas to make the strengthened areas even more stronger.
I loved my Spiritual Gifts profile. I love my Spiritual gifts and I am right in line with what I enjoy doing for God's kingdom. Discernment, Encouraging/Exhorting, Hospitality, Leadership, Pastor/Shepherd and Teaching are all within three of each other on the Spiritual Gifts Chart. I can read people easily and I am a good listener to which I can search and probe for deeper information. I do love to encourage others and, yes, I do exhort and people do not seem to be offended if I suggest spiritual truths in there lives or something they should ponder that might be helpful to them. I gain energy by having people in my home whether it be for dinner or overnight guests. I do take joy in leading and I often bubble to the top in situations easily and I do not demand leadership or ask for it. I struggle in groups when no one is leading. It seems if no one is leading the eyes of the group seem to gravitate towards me to take the leadership. I love to pastor/shepherd people and encourage them to walk with God intimately I love to encourage them to go to their closet and through themselves on the ground and talk with God. I love to teach them how to enjoy a thriving relationship with Christ whether it is through journalling, going on long walks and talking with him, reading their Bible and getting to know their creator who made them.
Overall, my Spiritual Assessment, DISC Profile and Spiritual Gifts Assessment have been helpful to figuring out my strengths and weaknesses and areas I need to work on. I love going through the results of the tests and I am reminded that I need to constantly but aware of my strengths and weaknesses so that I can work on either of them. I will reflect much on these assessments even a year from now or take the assessments again to see how God has molded me and changed me different areas of my life. I believe I am designed for coaching and I can see where the Lord could use me in women's lives.
My goal through all this tests is to "change from one degree of the glory to another." My goal is to use my strengths, weaknesses, spiritual gifts, and personality profiles to eagerly embrace the Lord changing me for his kingdom. I cannot do anything on my own strength but it is his work that is with in me. I am overwhelmed with the opportunity this coaching course has given me to look at myself, inside and out, see the truths that I need to see and ask God to mold me into the person he wants me to become. It is not always easy... sanctifying work but it is necessary.